Each morning I wake up and as I am getting ready for the day I hear the Call to Prayer off in the distance. Although it is a call to pray for those of another faith, it is certainly a call for me to pray too. Although my heart breaks for those we are participating in this daily ritual, I am thankful for a reminder of why I am here. I, too, am called to pray.
Never before has my need for prayer, for Jesus, for grace, seemed SO great! In the past two weeks I have been confronted with fears that I didn’t know I would face, a heart that is full of envy, pride and selfishness, and at times I have even asked the question “what are we doing here?”
I have always believed that the Satan is at work, just like 1 Peter says, “…like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour,” but now I am really seeing the affects firsthand. He knows our strengths and our weaknesses and likes to hone in on both! Although some of these struggles are not new, they have certainly been heightened. I have to keep in mind that when we chose to be a part of pushing back the darkness in Tanzania, Satan began to see us as an even greater threat, so I guess we shouldn’t be surprised by all that is coming at us.
I was talking to one of my teammates earlier in the week and sharing the things that the Lord has been teaching me though my struggles. She shared that when she goes through hard times here in Tanzania God reminds her of the HOPE that she has in Him. The WHOLE reason we are here is to offer that HOPE to people who have never heard. Wow! How blessed I am to live in HOPE and to have the opportunity to offer that HOPE to others.
To be honest, for my first few weeks here I felt like I was in survival mode, trying to keep my sanity and my kids alive! However, for the first time yesterday, I felt that I was allowing God to break my heart for the people here. Chandler and I were walking back from a coffee shop down the street and out of nowhere I got chocked up as I was talking to him and I could barely finish my sentence. There I was walking on the streets of Tanzanian and seeing with my own eyes the people I had prayed about for so long. It’s kinda crazy how you can spent 1.5 years in training, 2 years raising support, pack your whole life up, board an international airplane, arrive in another country and STILL forget at times what you are really doing. But I am thankful for that moment when my gracious and patient Heavenly Father helped me remember why He called me here. I am called to pray. I am called to offer hope. I am called to be with Jesus.
Jamie,
Thank you for being there. Thank you for giving the gift of presence. I know about being overwhelmed during these days of language and culture study. I know what it is like to be controlled by fear wondering if God is really good like He says He is. My only hope during those days of discouragement were to run to the arms of my Heavenly Father. I was encouraged to hear that you are allowing the call to prayer to also call you to prayer. May God surround you with His peace and grace.
Thank you so much for your kind words! Definitely an encouragement to me. May we be quick to run to our Father!
Dear family, I have you in my prayers daily. I have only a glimpse of being in a foreign country with a different language and different culture BUT I knew it was short lived and I would climb back onto that cruise line. What you have done was is follow His WILL and HE will carry you through. So glad to see the children interacting with the people there and they will be used I am sure in many ways to help you and Chandler Share HIS word. Love you….Aunt Janet
Thanks for your prayers, Aunt Janet. They mean so much to us!
My dear sweet Jamie. What heart felt words. As much as I hate to admit it you are where you are suppose to be and want to be. l know it is quite an adjustment. Or I can only imagine. You have the strength to do this. That is why you were sent there. Be strong. Love you and miss you dearly.
Thanks, Aunt Angie! We love you guys so much and miss you too!!!