Our Cali is extremely angry and defiant these days, and we’re not sure if it’s because we’re leaving “home” again soon and she’s an emotional mess, or if it’s just because she’s a stubborn child of Adam. Either way, it’s pretty much consuming our days. There’s nothing like a ballistic 2 year old to put you in tears at a loss for what to do. It feels like no amount of compassion and no amount of firmness or discipline makes a difference. Even though our staff advisors are talking to us and trying to help and counsel us, we still feel pretty lost. In fact I’m feeling kind of scared to set out on our summer adventures with her in this frame of mind. Because at any given moment she might be hysterical.
We’re getting tired, too. Wanted so much to finish strong this semester, but we’re just squeaking in the homework assignments barely on time and not feeling like we put as much into it as it was worth.
And we still aren’t sure of our summer plans or precisely where we will be 3 weeks from today.
(Sorry…I’m not trying to be discouraging…I promise the story is going to turn into an encouraging one in a minute.)
So as you can imagine, we do not feel very good about ourselves right now.
BUT this morning we were walking into church, and as we approached the building we could hear the worship team practicing. “Your grace is enough”, they were singing. “Your grace is enough.” Over and over again. “Your grace is enough, Your grace is enough.” Jevon and I looked at each other and assured each other that was the TRUTH. His grace is enough even for us. 🙂
Then, this afternoon, I had some God-time while Cali and Karina were taking their afternoon nap. I’m reading in 1 Samuel these days, and I learned something new that made me really happy. Jevon was sitting at the kitchen table studying, and I interupted him. I interupt him alot. I shouldn’t, but he’s very patient with me. “Hey Jevon, you know that verse of ‘Come Thou Fount’…the old version of it…the one that says ‘Here I raise my Ebenezer; here by Thy great help I’ve come…’?”
“yeah”
“Do you know what in the world ‘Ebenezer’ is talking about?”
“I used to, but I can’t remember”.
“Well I never knew. But I was reading this story and I found out what it means.” I began to summarize the story. It was when the Israelites were being oppressed by the Philistines, and Samuel told them to gather at Mizpah, where he would intercede for them. So the Israelites gathered. And when the Philistines heard about the masses of Israelites gathering at Mizpah, they thought those Israelites must be up to no good, so the Philistines mustered their forces and came out to attack them. The Isreaelites told Samuel “don’t stop praying for us.” And Samuel didn’t stop, of course. He offered a sacrifice for them. And then God thundered with such terrifying thunder that the Philistines freaked out and started running away. When the Isrealites saw that the Philistines were running away, they took off after them, chased them down and slaughtered lots of them. That was a huge victory. Not a final defeat of the Philistines, but a huge victory anyways. And Samuel set up a stone, which he called “Ebenezer”, meaning “Stone of Help”. And he said, “Thus far the LORD has helped us.”
So there you have it. That’s what Ebenezer means. Ebenezer was a monument to all that God had done up to that point for Israel. God’s people set up monuments commemmorating God’s help quite often. But this monument wasn’t just one for looking back at what God had already done, it was also a monument looking forward to what God would do. It was a monument of expectation. When somebody says “thus far”, it’s because it’s not the end of the story yet. There’s more to come. And if God has got us this far, surely He will help us the rest of the way.
We’ve been trying to think of a name for our car. Ashley Schick told us that we have to give our car a name. And we kept thinking well, we’ll think of one someday. We should think of one before we see Ashley again this summer.
Well at last the car has a name. It’s name is Ebenezer. So wherever we may happen to be in the country at any given time, if we start to feel discouraged, the car’s name can be a monument to remind us – God helped us this far, and He’ll help us to the end. His grace really is enough, even for us clueless parents/tired students/wanna-be missionaries.
And let’s not forget that while we see ourselves as clueless parents/tired students/wanna-be missionaries, GOD sees us as His vessels – containers for carrying His mercy to other people…His ambassadors for carrying His message of reconcilition to others…His trophies for showing off the power of His grace in the ages to come. That’s something to get encouraged about.
David Abbott says
If it’s any consolation, when we first moved to the Philippines our 2 1/2 year old son stood at the top of a play area in McDonalds and shouted repeatedly “I don’t love God!” at the top of his lungs.