She is watching.
Who, you might ask?
This sweet girl. My daughter. My Selah Grace.
This past week I decided to get my tail in gear and get serious about working out and getting back in shape…especially since we are leaving for Tanzania in 10 short months!
The parsonage that we are living in shares a parking lot with the church next door. This parking lot has become a huge blessing…a free gym for me to jog and walk. Selah desperately wanted to come with me this morning at 7:30am, but I told her I would probably be walking and jogging faster than she could keep up (which now I am rethinking, seeing how my jog may be slower than her normal paced walk). But I said she could look out the door and watch me. And watch she did.
As I circled round and round that parking lot I could see her sweet face, blond hair and small hand (that is growing way too fast) as she waved at me from behind the smudged glass. She was watching me.
It got me thinking. Not only is she watching me right now as I run round and round this church parking lot, but she is watching everything I do every day. She sees the way I love her and meet her needs. She see me when I am going to lose it when I’m trying to make dinner and every child has chosen to get into something different. She sees when I am short with her Papa and say things I regret. She sees when I teach her stories from the Bible. She sees it all.
That is a little scary. I mean, right now, I have the greatest ability and opportunity to impact her little life.
Then I thought about Jesus and how she doesn’t know Him yet. Yes, we talk about Him ALL the time. We pray to Him and sing to Him. But she doesn’t know Him yet, I mean, really know Him. So what does that mean for me right now? That means I am the hands and feet of Jesus to her. I am the touch of Jesus to her. I am the voice of Jesus to her. What kind of Jesus am I portraying to her each day as she is watching me? Do I display love and grace and mercy? Do I practice patience and self-control?
Those are big shoes to fill. But it is my prayer, as she is watching me, that she will see Jesus inside of me. It is my prayer that the way that I act and love and serve will point her to Him. For He is good.