Husbands in the ‘hood

Since entering Mexico almost one month ago, life has changed dramatically! On the surface, things often appear similar… we go to classes, check out local food, visit with friends and neighbors (albeit in another language!), and have normal family life in our home. Yet so much of that sense of ‘normal’ is merely a first impression, quickly proven false when pressed upon! Here are a few notes from our ‘cultural journal’ these past weeks, as we adjust to a new normal…

In Mexico, life simply moves at a different pace. You have great intentions about achieving tasks A, B, and C one day… but all the parts for A are out of stock at the only store that carries them, your partner for B unexpectedly had a sick family member, and after seven phone calls that took all day you feel lucky to have accomplished C! (Fortunately, your friend showed up two days early to help with H and J, so all is well.)

When learning Spanish in high school and college, I was taught the word ‘barrio’ for neighborhood. Oddly enough, no one here uses that word! Oh, they understand it… but prefer to use the world ‘colonia’ instead. Upon asking our neighbor Hilario, we learned that the local gangs often refer to themselves as ‘barrios’… and so the word now has a negative connotation. (Get it? They’re ‘hoods’!)

Speaking of neighborhoods, those are vastly more important here than in the United States. Everyone’s address includes their neighborhood printed on the label, and your colonia is more vital to your address than just about any other part!

In the United States, we frequently hear the phrase “no means no.” In Mexico, this is often not the case! A simple ‘no’ can be interpreted as a negotiating position (or as just plain rude!); if you really want to say ‘no’, you need to say ‘thank you!’

Everyone here is incredibly friendly! We’ve already had dinner at a local friend’s house, plan on reciprocating soon to teach her how to make lasagne, and tomorrow will have yet another neighbor join us for dinner. Yet through this we’ve learned that our definitions for the evening meal differ widely, and that American’s tend to eat dinner during Mexico’s afternoon snack hour! We also discovered that our tastes can vary wildly; read about menudo sometime if you’re curious what dinner was like at our friend’s house!

Finally, we’ve found that the culture’s friendliness comes with certain responsibilities. In the United States, we’d think nothing of entering a room and greeting some people while passing others by. In Mexico, such an insult would cause serious relational rifts: you must greet everyone personally, even if that requires interrupting a conversation (or a meeting to which you arrived late!). Refusing to interrupt is by far the ruder choice… fortunately, we are surrounded by friends who understand our ignorance and are willing to give us the benefit of the doubt!

As you can see, we have a lot to learn. At the same time, we are incredibly grateful to be here and to be settling in! Please pray for us any time you think of us… whether for family time, the new baby, language and culture learning, or simply finding time for all we need to do: I doubt you could think of a potential need which wouldn’t be good to lift before the Lord! But as you pray, please also thank God for His continuing faithfulness. Through every twist and change, we continue to find Him sufficient and are grateful that He wants to use us to further His Kingdom!