Susie
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I’m not in Kansas anymore . . .

December 23, 2013 by Susie

Yesterday when I was in town I noticed some Christmas lights lit up and all felt right with the world. But then I started laughing because I remembered I was on the back of a moto without even a sweatshirt and I had sandals on my feet. Yup, I’m not in Kansas (or Wisconsin) anymore.

I was actually on my way home from a Sunday school Christmas party at the time. We were told it would start at 2:00. We got there about 3:15. It started by 4:30. Yup, I’m not in Kansas anymore.

While we were waiting for it to start I was talking with one of my good friends. I asked her what a bat is called in Jula, but since I was asking in Jula I had to describe it – that thing that’s not a bird but flies at night, and during the day it sleeps in the trees with its feet up and its head down. She figured out what I was talking about and asked if it was a “chauve souris” (literally “bald mouse”), its name in French. Yup, that. But she assured me that it was a bird. Yup, I’m not in Kansas anymore.

While we continued to talk and wait we talked about the fact that she wanted to try to pass the test to get the equivalent of a 10th grade diploma, since she never had. I had known that she wanted to do that and have encouraged her to do so. But today she said that to get any job in the public sector you can’t be any older than 37-years-old and she’s already 42. So before she takes the test, she has to go to the mayor’s office and get her birth certificate changed to say she’s younger. I asked her how she’d do that, and she said that she’d just go in and say that she didn’t think her age was right on her birth certificate. The mayor will ask about how old she thinks she is and she’ll reply 32. Then they’ll change her birth certificate to say that she’s 32. After that she can take the test and, if she passes, get a job. And I think it’s all legal. Yup, I’m not in Kansas (or anywhere in the US!) anymore.

On our way to the Christmas party she was driving my moto and noticed that I had two mirrors on it. She commented that I really should get rid of one, since it’s not stylish to have two mirrors now-a-days. There’s no need for the right one, anyway, since people aren’t supposed to pass you on the right. Here working speedometers are also rare, and there aren’t many speed limits either. And she made sure to tell me not to learn to use my turn signals, either, since no one pays attention to them. If you’re turning left it’s better to put out your left hand and then perhaps people won’t try to pass you on the left as you’re turning. Yup, I’m not in Kansas anymore.

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